3 Weeks on T   1 comment

Believe it or not, it’s still hard for me to actively think of myself as male.  Don’t get me wrong, I’m not confused one damn bit.  It’s just that I hid for so long – from everyone, including myself – that it’s become habit to automatically correct every thought that goes through my head.  Funny how the exact opposite was true when I was about 8 and had to make an effort to think of myself as female.

It’s time to start working out.  I noticed Friday my muscles were already starting to get bigger, so I hit the weights this morning.  Dude…I still hate working out.  There is an upside though – I’ve noticed that it’s hard for me to sit still.  Like if I stop thinking and just listen to what my body wants to do, I’ll find myself up and moving around.  That’s really cool because usually what my body wants to do is chill out in the recliner and eat ice cream.

I’m starting to get apprehensive about the legal stuff.  And the cost of the legal stuff.  I think just to have your name changed it’s like a $200 filing fee.  And here’s something else – the federal government will not recognize me as male.  So whatever I put into social security I won’t get back because they can’t reconcile my gender with what’s attached to my SSN.  And getting my gender marker changed on my driver’s license?  I heard about this one MTF that got a letter from the woman working at the DPS telling her she was going to hell.  Seriously, what kind of shit is that??

Okay, I think that’s it for now.  I’ve got some things percolating in my head about community and socialization but they’re not ready yet.  Later gators.


Posted January 22, 2012 by justanotherfatboy in Uncategorized

One response to “3 Weeks on T

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  1. The legal stuff is why I thought what you are doing is brave. I imagine the change on ssn and driver’s license is going to be a pain to have to do. Those are probably the toughest obstacles you will have to face.
    Just keep going dude !

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