Zero   4 comments

Some of y’all have met Zero.  Some of y’all have never met me, let alone Zero, so I’ll explain.  Zero is my bird.  Zero is a peachfaced lovebird, 4 years old, and about 4 1/2 inches tall with a classic Napoleon complex.  Zero is my constant companion and is sitting on the keyboard while I’m writing this.

The bird. The myth. The legend.

Zero had to go to the vet last week for a general checkup.  We thought it would be a good idea to have Zero DNA sexed – you can’t tell just looking at a lovebird if it’s a he or a she.  There are some behavioral clues, but outside of actually laying an egg (which never happened at our house), those aren’t that reliable.  We were pretty sure Zero was male, but thought it best to be 100% certain just for possible future health issues.  We got the results back late Monday afternoon.

“Congratulations!  It’s a girl!”

Daddy’s little guy.  The Zeroman.  Slayer of writing instruments, destroyer of all things paper, bane of quadripeds feline and canine…is a girl.

I’ve got a lot of thoughts on the subject, but every time I write them down, it reads like a paper on gender studies or something.  Or like I’m gonna take the bird out in a pasture and hang him on the barbed wire fence.  Suffice it to say El Birdo is a better genderbender than I am and the joke’s on me.



Posted April 25, 2012 by justanotherfatboy in Uncategorized

4 responses to “Zero

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  1. Thanks for writing Layne!! It helped me get caught up on the goings on…you are doing so much for all of us with this blog. You never know who you touch when you put it all out there! I’m so proud! I need a movie night and great conversation! A late night at Denny’s would be awesome! I miss you! Wish I could see you and Sarah. Love you both.

  2. What does your DNA say?

    BAM. You just got mind fucked.

  3. I’m dumb. I didn’t see the last paragraph.

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